Stops and starts.
This is the first time since 2018 that I've felt comfortable as her birthday passed. I'm not too sure why, but I felt more at peace.
And with that I feel more convinced to move forward. I realized I never imagined myself at 70, 80. Probably because I didn't think it could be a possibility. I'm not talking about probability here- I mean, if you weren't sick or anything how do you envision your ideal life at 70 or 80? I didn't think I'd reach my age now! It was all dark in my head.
I got a thousand dead-end starts in my life. But I want to start envisioning a lived life at 70, 80. I want to live. I want to have more stories. Add more textures in my life. I hope they're good. If not, I hope I can get back up and start again.
Shall we begin again?
